Really, it was the last part that definitely had me chuckling. My friend Katie sent it to me and I thought I would share:

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK

Indubitably

Innovative

Preliminary

Proliferation

Cinnamon



THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK

Specificity

British Constitution

Passive-aggressive disorder

Loquacious

Transubstantiate



THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK

"Thanks, but I don't want to have sex"

"Nope, no more booze for me"

"Sorry, but you're not really my type"

"Good evening officer, isn't it lovely out tonight?"

"Oh I couldn't, nobody wants to hear me sing...."

Just got a call back from Dirk Farrow who's with Church Street Entertainment and he had some news to share. Turns out CSE has bought the old Kate O'Brien's and Shannagolden spaces on West Central Boulevard in downtown Orlando. He says they'll be transforming it into something "Orlando has never seen or done before."

Upon further questioning he did reveal that it would be a bar/restaurant with an upscale feel geared toward an older (and I'm sure wealthier) demo. Last time I checked that has been seen and definitely done in Orlando, but I'm curious what else there is to it. I'm taking a tour next week and I'll let you know what else I can dig up, in the meantime, the tentative opening date is the beginning of March. It's good to see the space being utilized again.

Yeah, this has nothing to do with drinking or bars and clubs per say, but I'll definitely be offering a toast to this guy tonight. RIP Kevin DuBrow, without you, my hair in the '80s may not had been as high (or wide for that matter), my jeans so ripped or my music choices so loud. Cum on feel the noize folks and pay this man his respects.

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/11/27/arts/27dubrow.html?ref=arts

Here's the column this week folks, have a great weekend!

You've heard me mention a couple of times in this column how so many of the local gay bars are dying off. That's why I was happy to hear about some regulars at the bar off Edgewater Drive that used to be Faces. These people decided to keep the "legacy" of the old space and owner alive.

I was looking forward to stopping by the new spot at 3925 Clarcona-Ocoee Road in Orlando last weekend to catch lady rawkers D29. But too much partying at the Anti Pop Music Festival put the kibosh on that, so I stopped by aptly named Legacy Club a couple of nights later.

Owners Tami Robinson and Francine Uva were hanging out watching the Seahawks-49ers game and chatting with the regulars at this lesbian-friendly bar. A far cry from a near-capacity crowd for the show two nights before, according to Uva, but she seemed cool with that.

Robinson and Uva had frequented Faces, one of the first lesbian bars in Orlando. They opened this bar in memory of Faces, and its owner Sue Hannah, who passed away from cancer earlier this year.

"It's just about trying to keep a legacy going," says Uva.

The space should do quite well considering few bars in town serve the lesbian community.

The drink specials won't hurt either, with happy hour all day on Monday and from 4-8 p.m. Tuesday-Sunday. I had a Michelob Ultra, and my friend had a Miller Lite for $2 a pop. Not bad. On Tuesdays, the bar plays host to Bar Bingo for a buck a card, and on Wednesdays, Dame Edna steps in to host "Karaoke Madness" from 8 p.m. until midnight. Fans of Southern Nights at 375 S. Bumby Ave., which reopens this weekend as Revolution, will dig Saturday's drag queen shows starting at 11 p.m. and hosted by Leigh Shannon and Page King.

The space is actually rather large with the stage front and center, directly across from the bar. Tables and seats are available if you don't feel like standing to watch a show or the game.

This is full liquor, folks, and the owners are firm on their 21-and-up policy at the bar.

Formerly a biker bar, not much had to be updated. But the bartender was quick to point out that Legacy has the cleanest bathrooms of any gay bar in town. There is smoking inside so if you need any fresh air, there's an outside area in the back complete with a tiki bar and a volleyball court.

With the legacy of Faces, and a regulars crowd already built in, Legacy shouldn't have any problems sticking around for quite a while.

The Legacy Club is at 3925 Clarcona-Ocoee Road in Orlando, call 407-521-2007 or go to myspace.com/thelegacyclub07


Rhythm & Flow no mo?

*Looks like Rhythm & Flow Ultra Lounge at 2 S. Orange Ave. has shut its doors for good. Over the weekend, you couldn't help but notice the front entrance locked, and the lights out at the club that really started downtown's ultra lounge trend a few years back. For the most part, they did it in a classy way -- something I can't really vouch for with others that have since opened. Rumors of eviction are swirling, but I'm still waiting for a final answer from the owner, and will let you know as soon as I hear something.


Pre-Turkey Day parties

*Unlike other cities, this town isn't necessarily hopping with nightlife events during Thanksgiving week. Probably because most people traveling into Orlando are tourists, and most people traveling out are heading back to where they came from. Needless to say, that never stops Wall Street Plaza from finding a reason to party over just about anything. There will be no cover for Wednesday's "Night Before Thanksgiving Block Party," which goes from 5 p.m.-2 a.m. There will be an outdoor dance floor set up, and specials will include, appropriately, $3.50 shots of Wild Turkey. Call 407-849-0471 to get more information.

Kelly Fitzpatrick can be reached at 407-420-5710.
kfitzpatrick@metromix.com

In case you haven't heard, Dolce owner and former owner of Club Paris Fred Khalilian has been arrested on rape charges. This is damn serious and is supposedly not the first time, here's the story I just read in the Orlando Sentinel about it:

http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/local/crime/orl-rape1507nov15,0,2626135.story?coll=orl_tab01_layout

So those of you mourning the passing of Southern Nights at 375 S. Bumby Ave. in Orlando, will probably be at the grand opening of Revolution tomorrow night (Nov. 15). It's good to see that the gay and lesbian nightlife community is bouncing back from the string of closings that took place this past summer. From the looks of it, Revolution seems a lot like the old Southern but with a  new name. It was bad books that killed the old place, not a lack of customer base. So why fix it if it ain't broken? Go to their MySpace page for more info: http://www.myspace.com/orlnightlife

I grabbed a cab the other night after a stint at Rock for Hunger that took place in downtown Orlando on Saturday. After three days of partying between Martinifest and Anti Pop Music Festival I had no right to be behind a wheel, even if i didn't have a drop in me that day.

But of course I did, so Casey and I decided the responsible thing to do was to grab a cab home. There was one sitting right outside the BackBooth which worked out great. At least at first I thought so. 

We pull out to Orange Avenue and Casey and I are chatting away about the show when Casey notices the cab driver hadn't put on the meter yet. Casey asks him to. The cab driver ignores Casey. Casey asks again, his voice much louder this time. The cabbie again ignores him. The third time there is an f-bomb thrown into the request and finally the cabbie answered, "$10 minimum."

We were almost at Church Street at this point and Casey made it clear either turn on the meter or let us out, the cabbie repeated $10 minimum and wouldn't stop. That's when Casey started screaming at the dude to pull over and let us out. We hit a red light thankfully because the guy really had no intention of letting us out I think. We jumped out down by City Hall. Good times. 

We grabbed another cab and Casey vented to him but he really didn't seem to give a crap and looked as if he would had done the same thing if it already hadn't been done to us earlier. Casey said it's because the cab drivers in town are pissed over the pedicabbers and O-Cart folks being able to drive down Orange on weekends and they can't. I don't care what their reasons are, the guy was looking at kidnapping charges if he drove another inch. That was seriously one of the more disturbing moments I've been through in this town.

Has anyone else had this happen to them? I wasn't aware this was a problem but according to Casey it is. Someone really needs to speak up about this. 

Still riding on a bit of a beer-snob kick, I was excited when I received a call last week from Rick Kitt, owner of the new O-Town Art Cafe & Wine Bar, to tell me his new space at 37 S. Magnolia Ave. will be stocked with not only wine but import beers, as well. My friend Heather, who digs the wine part of this equation, met me after work last week to sample the selection.

Most people who frequent downtown Orlando will be familiar with the space that O-Town inhabits, formerly Natura Coffee & Tea and before that Guinevere's. Although the name "O-Town" is a bit overused (I have images of boy bands in my head), the spot is very laid back and has a cool vibe about it.

With basically the same layout as its predecessors, there is more cafe-type seating scattered around the space, which is considerably more dressed up than before. It's small but never seems crowded, even with the increased seating, and gone are the movie posters from when the Downtown Media Arts Center was there. In place of the posters is artwork borrowed from the gallery in the adjoining room.

I grabbed the beer list, and Kitt was true to his word -- there were many to choose from. I started with a Young's Double Chocolate Stout that lived up to the chocolate in its name. Oh so yummy, although a bit pricey at $8 a bottle, but there's enough in the bottle, and it's rich enough, that you'll be sipping this stout for some time. Probably the same amount of time I could down a couple of Mich Ultras, which would probably cost about the same. Heather had a glass of Moon Mountain Cabernet Sauvignon, which she enjoyed, also $8 a glass. But my favorite was the Rodenbach Redbach, which tasted like a cherry Jolly Rancher and, at $5 with $1 off for Belgian beer night, made my purse happy.

Besides Belgian beer night -- every Monday -- there's also $4 Saketini nights on Tuesday; Ladies '80s night on Wednesdays with a DJ and free sangria for ladies all night; art night on Thursdays, which will open the bar to local artists to work in the space; live entertainment will take over Fridays and Saturdays; and on Sundays the bar opens early for a "Liquid Brunch."

As the name implies, food is not the focus at this brunch: The $3 sangrias and mimosas are. The bar does offer antipasto and cheese trays if you start getting that rumble in your belly.

Later on Sundays there is a new open-mike night starting at 8:30. Hours are normally 4 p.m.-midnight Monday-Thursday, 4 p.m.-2 a.m. on Friday, 6 p.m.-2 a.m. on Saturday and noon-midnight on Sunday.

Since the bar opened just a month ago, it's still working out the kinks here and there, but for the most part the place seems to be on the right track.

A state classic

Even though the temperature is cooling, the competitive spirit around Central Florida is going to heat up this time next weekend. That's because the annual Walt Disney World Florida Classic game takes place at the Citrus Bowl on Nov. 17.

But the die-hard Bethune-Cookman Wildcats and Florida A&M Rattlers fans not only come for the game, they also come for the parties and entertainment leading up to and after the game.

I figured I'd clue you in on a couple of those events so you don't miss out on anything.

*The UCF Arena will kick things off on Thursday with the aptly named 2007 Classic Weekend Comedy Kick-Off. The show will feature Arnez J, George Wilborn and Shawty. The show will be hosted by Tight Mike and all attendees are asked to bring a canned food item for Second Harvest Food Bank of Orlando. Doors open at 7 p.m. and ticket prices vary; call 1-212-222-0883, Ext. 1.

*Roxy is normally a party hub for Florida Classic events, and that hasn't changed this year in the slightest. Next Friday night, the club has renamed its regular Phat Friday event Phat Friday Classic Edition and will bring in DJ Nasty, DJ Deezy, O'Town and others. The party starts at 10 p.m. Nov. 16 and is $30 general admission, $75 for VIP and $100 for platinum VIP. Ladies 18 and over and men 21 and over are invited. Roxy is at 740 Bennett Road in Orlando; call 407-989-4004.

*Nov. 17, Roxy keeps the party going after the game with its 9th Annual Classic Luau with Bigga Rankin of Cool Running DJs. This party is a bit more expensive, at $40 for general, $80 for VIP and $125 for the platinum VIP, but everyone 18 and older can come. Doors open at 9:30 p.m.

*House of Blues in Downtown Disney brings you Classic Grown Folks Night on Nov. 17 at 9 p.m. Doug E. Fresh and BET's DJ Q-45 will perform for those of you still wanting to party. Price is $45-$65 and doors open at 9 p.m.; call 407-934-2583.

*In downtown Orlando, Club Firestone gets in on the after-game party action, inviting Trick Daddy to the stage. Along with him will be Lil Wayne and Lil' Boosie at the Annual Classic Block Party starting at 5 p.m. Tickets are $39.99 and $79.99 for VIP. Club Firestone is at 578 N. Orange Ave., call 407-872-0066.

*Finishing off the weekend, Trick Daddy heads over to the Central Florida Fairgrounds on Nov. 18 for the 8th Annual Florida Classic Car Show and Concert. Trick Daddy also will have Lil' Boosie, Yola the Great and DJ UNK along for the ride. The show starts at 2 p.m. and it's $25 to get in; call 407-290-9896.

So, I'm frustrated because the hyperlink and picture buttons aren't working on this here blog. I wanted to post pictures my friend Paul sent me of my costume for Halloween: a post-apocalyptic pest control worker, but alas. 

Speaking of my friend Paul, you'll be seeing him chime in here soon enough on this ol' blog. Once we get everything up to snuff, and figure out how to add simple things like pictures and our sigs so you know which one of us is actually blogging.

I need a drink.

Lucky for me Martinifest is tonight in downtown Orlando. This seriously is one of the better drink fests that happen annually. There are over 50 booths with a different type of martini for you to sample, the ample amount of booths cuts down on the long wait time and allows you to try more of the martinis. I wish other festivals would understand that concept (ahem, Florida International Beer Festival folks I'm talking to you.) 

And even though $30 seems kind of pricey, you are seriously getting a lot of martini for your money. Think about it, $30 would roughly buy you three martinis anywhere else. Since I can't hyperlink let me spell out the info for you right here, the event is from 6:30 - 9:30 p.m. tonight down at Church Street. The folks at Tryst are kind enough to bring it to us and if their martinis are any indication of how good it will be, it's going to be fantastic.

Since there isn't a columnist area on the site anymore, I figured I would post my weekly columns here. You might catch it Thursday or Friday depending on how ambitious our slammed I am that day. Have a great weekend guys!

There's a reason I have this job: because I like to go out a lot, and have a drink or two while I'm doing it. That was a good thing this week, because nothing really went as planned.

Voyage (remember, Voy-ahge) was on my list of places to go this past weekend, but a costume mishap (I didn't have one yet), and a party I forgot about, postponed my trip to this new downtown club on Pine Street.

Instead, I decided I would go to Lux's new Euro Night, which this International Drive lounge has been touting on its Web site. Supposedly, everyone can get in free and drink free until 11 p.m. I've been broke as a joke, and a free cover and free drinks sounded very appealing. But when I arrived at 10:30 p.m., the doors were locked.

This wasn't that surprising, considering Lux was the bar that was supposed to be called Blue I's, which week after week mentioned a grand opening that never happened. Finally, the bar renamed itself and opened last summer with a new ultra-lounge concept (which really isn't that new). The location, in a strip mall, doesn't scream swank or lounge, with a sign so small you can barely make it out from the parking lot. (My friends and I drove in circles a couple of times before spotting it.)

So, what do you do when nothing seems to go as planned? Rely on an old standard. Cricketers Arms Pub has been here for years, but in the past year it moved from its original location in The Mercado to the Festival Bay Mall on International Drive. I hadn't had a chance to check out the new joint, so when Lux failed me, I drove a couple miles up the road to that English pub that has loyally served Orlando for many years.

The move was initiated because tourists abandoned The Mercado. That place is seriously sad. Festival Bay has never been jampacked during the times I've stopped by, either, but for a Tuesday night, Cricketers was bringing in a decent crowd. The previous location attracted lots of service-industry workers and tourists, and that still seems to be par for the course at this location as well.

The interior woodwork, stage and nook seating make this location more appealing. A fireplace opposite the stage gives the pub a cozy feel. Two bars are set up, one inside, where the stage is located, and another on the patio in front, where the majority of the customers were hanging out the night I was there.

Because it's I-Drive, prices are a bit steeper than what you would pay elsewhere, with domestic pints creeping over $4, and hand-drawn ales touching $6. But with 17 beers on tap -- four hand-drawn -- there is a good selection.

TVs in the joint are airing what you would expect in an English pub, football of course (no, not the American kind). Bands that include Willtown, Jeff Howell and Average Joe Band play the pub nightly and without a cover; the only night there isn't a band is Sunday, a k a karaoke night. In fact, this Saturday night, Cricketers will be throwing a birthday celebration for Joseph Graye of the Average Joe Band, and it's open to the public.

So if you're in the mood for a pint, some local music and a friendly atmosphere, stop by. If anything, it's open when it claims to be.

Cricketers Arms is at 5250 International Drive in Orlando. Call 407-354-0686.